Leavin on a jet plane...

College, college, college, isn't that all anyone ever talks about? At least to me that is. I can't go a single day without being asked; "So, when are you leaving?" "Are you just so excited?" "Do you have everything you need?" NO I DO NOT HAVE EVERYTHING I NEED, stop stressing me out. But in all seriousness, all this constant chatter about college can be extremely overwhelming. I've been thinking a lot about this lately. In just a matter of time, I will be on a plane to New Orleans, on my way to a completely new life. Sometimes as I'm driving by myself, I burst into tears thinking about how these familiar roads will soon be distant. I think about how soon I'll be saying goodbye to the people I love most, to my home, my comfy bed, ohhhh please don't let me say goodby to my comfy bed. But sometimes, as I'm driving by myself I break out into the biggest smile, thinking about all the exciting adventures to come, and the new people I'm about to meet. Needless to say, this is a time filled with so many different emotions.

I've recently realized that this is honestly a very selfish point in our lives. We get to go on and live a new life, start fresh, and explore so many new things. We are starting our "real lives" and it really is SO exciting. We are going to start living more independently and doing more and more things just because we want to. We will be given a freedom unlike any kind we had in high school. We get to study what we want, go out every single night if we want, and engage in any activities that we want. At times, it can feel like this whole college thing is really all about us experimenting and finding our way. I know that my parents are so incredibly happy for me as I am about to begin this journey, but I also know that a part of their hearts break every time I say how excited I am to leave. My brother looks at me with that sly scowl and I know deep down inside he resents me for going so far away from him. There is a part of me that feels guilty for going to a place miles and miles and an expensive plane ticket away from home. But, I've decided that I shouldn't let guilt be my main emotion in this situation. It's my time; my time to learn about myself, discover new things, and start living up to my full potential. And speaking for myself and so many other hard workers in high school, we have truly earned all these opportunities and should be very proud of all the accomplishments and milestones that have led us here today.

But, in the midst of all this excitement, it is SO important to remember where we came from. Remember who's paying for your education, who raised you to be the person you are, and who was there for you along the way. Don't discount your childhood either. Whether you realize it or not, every single one of us can take something from these past 18 years of our life. We can all learn from our past mistakes and accomplishments, from all the good and the bad. Don't forget all of the familiar people and the places in your life; these faces and destinations are a part of who you are today and will subconsciously guide you to grow into the person you will be tomorrow. Remember to say thank you to anyone who has taught you an important lesson. Remember to say I love you to your family. Remember to acknowledge your friends for all the times they spent with you, all the laughter and memories that you share. All of these familiar things will soon seem different and maybe even distant after coming back from new lives and adventures, but NEVER FORGET the impact they had on your life and how they can continue to guide your decisions and actions.

Also, its OK not to be excited for this new chapter. Not only is it OK, but it is COMPLETELY NORMAL!!! I know everyone expects us to be happy about all the coming changes, but there are parts of it that really aren't so exciting at all. The unknown is a very scary place, a place with no clarity, that can bring out our deepest insecurities. It is really hard for me not knowing what these next few years of my life are going to be like; if I will succeed or fail or if I will be truly happy in this new environment. Everything we once knew is about to change; we are no longer kids, we are going to be held to a certain set of expectations that we weren't held to before. It's so scary and sad to be ending a chapter of our lives, but it's so important to have faith in this new chapter because it's a blank slate and it's all up to us to make it mean something.

When August 24th comes, and I have to board that plane to New Orleans, I know I will be crying. Crying for my mom, the one person I am in constant communication with and who knows me better than anyone ever will. How will I go weeks without seeing her? Crying for my dad, my biggest rock and supporter, whose wisdom and love will no longer be just a flight of stairs away. Crying for my brother, my best friend in the whole world, the one person who has been with me through every important aspect of my child hood. Crying for my best friends, my high school, my hometown, my pink room, my nature filled backyard, everything that filled the days of my life. But I know as I board that plane I'll be smiling too. Smiling for a new city filled with new food, culture, and adventure. Smiling for a new school, where I'm ready to make my mark. Smiling for new friends, new people, and new experiences. Smiling for my future.

So, whether you are staying close to home, going far away, or maybe even choosing a different path such as a new job or lifestyle, know that it's OK to be feeling overwhelmed with emotions. It's OK to be scared and it's OK to be excited. Just know that you have the power to direct this new journey. Every single one of you has greatness inside of you that is just waiting to be unleashed. Let this new chapter be inspired by this greatness and let it be guided by what's in your heart. Don't lose sight of what made you who you are and go do AMAZING THINGS!!

Best of luck to everyone setting sail on a new journey. Remember that your inner power and strength can take you so far in life.

xoxo SOCO <3